Beautiful and raw. I love it. We only know what we know when we know it. Jessie knew your love and those final moments don't erase a lifetime of joy. Society puts too much pressure on "YOU MUST" stay instead of doing what is best for you. I fixated on that too as I felt immense guilt at how my dog's life ended. Jessie knew love. You were in a different place in life than you are now. I totally get all of the feelings though. Embrace them, it breaks my heart to think of the regrets I had at the end too. I won't sugarcoat it. But remember, Jessie would never want you to suffer here on earth :) xoxo